Oh, yeah, he’s still being an asshole – but at least this time you don’t have to read what he’s saying?
—
TRANSCRIPT
Panel 1 (Imogen, still talking on the phone, gesturing with hair clippers while Lucas listens)
Imogen: One day you’re telling me you want a divorce, the next you’re begging for forgiveness… -you want to see a marriage
counselor, then you’re talking to a lawyer just in case…
Panel 2 (Imogen, angry at the phone)
Imogen: I don’t have money to hire a fancy lawyer, Jonathan!
Panel 3 (Imogen rubs her forehead – she’s standing in front of the fridge calendar, and on it is written (pretty small, sorry) LAWYER and COUNSELOR scratched off a few times)
Imogen: No, no… I’m sorry. I’m sorry for raising my voice. Can we- you mentioned you still wanted to meet the counselor, right?
Panel 4 (Imogen stoops to write on the calendar)
Imogen: She said her next spot is Tuesday at- yes, I know you work- wait, you’re taking time off for a dentist appointment on Friday; if I call and move that can we do it then?
Panel 5 (Imogen looks accomplished, Lucas side-eyeing)
Imogen: See? Teamwork.
Hiring ANY attorney is out of reach for many people. In my case, I qualified for legal aid (i.e. free lawyer), but they didn’t have enough staff to take my case. I was able to hire someone through the “modest means” program, which required a $750 retainer. And that’s pretty much nothing. I ask for lawyer fees with every motion, but I’ve only been granted them once. It’s a very real problem.
There’s options other than having a lawyer take your case. It’s generally possible to find a one hour consultation for within $200, which can be a life saver. (I know that’s a lot – but it’s a helluva lot less than the $5k it usually takes for lawyers to take the case)
A lot of places have legal advice clinics as well. It’s possible to find social workers able to help out, as long as you get over the stigma of “social worker” – a good social worker is a real life fairy godmother.
Women’s shelters, domestic violence centers, schools, and hospitals are all places that have contacts. Therapists, especially those who work with families through divorce, will likely have resources as well.
It’s not always necessary to do any of this, in the comic case Imogen 100% needs someone to give her legal advice because her husband is almost certainly hiding assets from her and it can be difficult to get spousal support payments in some areas, which she’ll need to get on her feet.
Some family lawyers will also provide a free one-hour consultation for the first consult, so that they can get (and give you) the lay of the land for your particular situation and what would likely be needed moving forward. You can decide whether you want to retain their services from then. My husband availed himself of this back when he was going through a nasty visitation rights battle, and it was a huge help.
Gotta add: unbundled legal services.
Some jurisdictions have rules which make it possible for lawyers to work on discrete parts of a case without having to take on the whole enchilada. Traditionally, the model was if an attorney entered their appearance they/their firm had to handle all aspects of the case. But in jurisdictions that allow for it, it is possible to retain an attorney for one hearing or to ghost write a motion. Much less expensive if you have the wherewithal to manage your case yourself.
That child’s face is ON POINT.
A lot of places offer supports for this. Free legal aid clinics, lawyers who work pro bono or sliding scale, etc. Especially in cases like this they want to make sure the kids are cared for financially by the parents and don’t become a drain on the state because some jerk won’t take care of his own damn kids.
Contact women’s shelters and domestic violence resources near you. Please don’t feel ashamed or like you don’t deserve it or like you’re taking away from someone else – just contact them. They’re most likely to have a list of resources to point you in the right direction.
(note that this advice applies to men in Imogen’s position as well. Reaching out to women’s shelters can feel even more daunting then – it’s still worth a phone call to ask if they have any advice.)
Poor Lucas, I feel so badly for him.
Gotta say it really irks me that she’s still doing all the scheduling/organizing labor for him, including rescheduling his dentist appointment. I’m not blaming her for it, but DUDE.
Get the feeling Lucas has known the score for a while now.
I am thoroughly unsurprised with how this is going, but only since I have known maaaany Jonathans.
I’m with Lucas on this one
She DOES have money to see a lawyer because “his” money is their money. In fact, it’s probably the best thing she can do to consult one (even if it’s not for litigation or on retainer) for advice on how to guarantee an equitable divorce. My divorce finalized almost two years ago exactly and I was in her position, financially. Putting this out here as a PSA so people know.
WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
Poor Lucas. I hope Alex is off for a jog during these conversations because the temptation to rip Jonathan a new one would be OVERWHELMING.
I’ve watched a neighbour-friend be (figuratively) beaten down by her ex and his expensive lawyer who ran rings around the best lawyer she could afford. I’ve watched him use the whole process as a way of continuing to exert control over her, seemingly for no purpose except his own amusement. I’m watched him use their kids as weapons against her.
He doesn’t HAVE to act that way. He’s well off financially, they could have reached an equitable agreement long ago. But it’s almost like it’s a game to him, something with which to amuse himself.
What kind of arsehole does this to another human and a pair of kids?
It boils my blood.
Even more, and possibly worse, is I’ve watched his parents enable and support his behaviour, including backing his lies. These are your grandkids. Jesus.
Supporting him allows them to believe they’re good parents and their son is a good person. Admitting otherwise is too painful so they continue this.
A lot of crap in this world is people unable to face painful truth so adamantly sticking to comfortable lies.
oh baby no what, is you doing
I don’t need to know what Jonathan literally said to recognize tone-policing in action. Just, the secondhand cringe of shame at Imogen apologizing when she’s done absolutely nothing wrong – especially since she raised a valid point! Have they even *been* to a single session of counseling, or a single legal consultation? If not, hoo, son, HOO, SON.
In a single page, Jonathan’s proven both smarter and slimier than I anticipated, staying in control of the situation by keeping Imogen constantly playing defense and weaponizing her people-pleaser tendencies. Reminding her that *he’s* the one that works, telling her that *she’s* raising her voice, making *her* do the work of scheduling appointments that she can’t even guarantee he’ll keep… And that last panel, her saying “Teamwork!” Just…
Imogen!! DO NOT NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORISTS, HE HAS ALREADY HELD YOUR MONEY HOSTAGE. THE ONLY ONE SEEKING FORGIVENESS SHOULD BE HIM, ON YOUR TERMS.
I have just the *worst* knot of sympathetic frustration in my stomach right now and I love it, I truly do.
Can’t wait what Lucas has to say about all of this, both the haircut and the conversation.
(furtively glances at chapter title for no reason)
I see that “LAWYER” written on the calendar FOUR TIMES, Jonathan. Argh. All the gaslighting and tone policing and emotionally/financially abusive behavior we can infer from her one-sided conversation here. This page strikes home to TOO MANY WOMEN. If it hasn’t happened to us directly, it’s often happened to someone we know.
I really hope that Imogen has Lawyer on the calendar four times because she has consults scheduled. Not because she’s trying to schedule a joint session with a lawyer for legal advice. Because ONE lawyer really shouldn’t/CANT* advise BOTH parties to a divorce. Their interests are in conflict.
* “collaborative law” exceptions are a thing, but not everywhere. And damnit, if anyone needs someone to advise her of her rights and then advocate on her behalf, it’s Imogen!
I believe the creator lives in Canada. I know they allow it there but HOLY CRAP it is a BAD IDEA.
I knew a woman who was planning to do a joint lawyer and THANK GOD her husband has a massive drinking relapse and got arrested because it woke her up to the fact she needed her own protection.
He would’ve taken her to the cleaners because she was so desperate to people please.
Poor Imogen.
Yeah, I know it’s Canada and there is a joint option, (‘s why I mentioned collaborative law)…and that is usually only available if the couple is already in agreement on all the details. It’s not like going to someone for legal advice. Your friend really dodged a bullet it sounds like!
So yeah, that’s exactly what I’m worried about for Imogen. If they’re both seeing one lawyer then it’s either HIS lawyer (and Imogen is danger of being herded right into a settlement to her detriment), or it’s a situation where she’s not getting
advice about her interests and it’s just formalizing whatever he Jonathan cows her into.
I felt pretty singled out in the commentary the newest page, and frankly am still bristling at being accused of trying to “win the comments section…so Im probably going to not hang out here anymore. But I wanted to make that clear. I read this on my phone in the small hours when I get up with my kid usually. I am not at my most eloquent. Apologies to Lindsay I guess.
Why is she still managing *his* appointments???
…I know why. I’m just angry on her behalf.
I know it shouldn’t be his place but holy guacamole I hope Lucas has some Real Talk with him mom ASAP. He knows whats up.
Imogen is totally 100% believable here. I have been in her shoes. My ex thought I had a lot of nerve to demand he keep paying for me and our child to live in the city he trapped us in (by law, I wasn’t allowed to take the child out of state while divorce proceedings were in action), I thought he had a lot of nerve not to do childcare while I trained for a new job so I could afford to start paying for my own life.